A collection of jokes  

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A little girl asked her mother for a dollar to give
to an old lady in the park. Her mother was
touched by the child's kindness and gave her
the required sum.

"There you are, my dear," said the mother.
"But, tell me, isn't the lady able to work any more?"

"Oh yes," came the reply. "She sells candy."


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"Knock, Knock!"
"Who's there?"
"Emerson."
"Emerson who?"
"Emerson nice tits ya got there!"



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blonde calls up the operator..'hello operator can you tell me the time
difference between australia and new zealand?' ..operator replies,'sure just
a minute'

...blonde says 'thankyou!' and hangs up



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The suave Central American diplomat was talking to the
prim and proper Washington hostess. "In my country,"
he said, "the most popular of all activities is making
love."

Shocked, the wide eyed hostess said, "Oh!! Isnt that
revolting!"

"No," the diplomat said. "That's our second favorite
activity."



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Lil' Johnny was misbehaving. His mother said, "Johnny, why can't
you be good?"
Johnny answered, "I'll be good for a quarter."
"Why son, when I was YOUR age, I was good for nothing!"



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A secretary, out with appendicitis, was being visited by a
  co-worker in the hospital.
  "How are things at the Office going, Claudia?" she asked.

  "Well, they're all sharing your work. Jody is making the
  coffee, Louise is reading all your magazines, and Sharon
  is making it with the Boss."



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One day Little Susie got her "monthly bleeding" for the first time
in her life. Having failed to understand what was going on and being
really frightened, she decided to share her trouble with little
Johnny.

Having found Johnny she told and showed him what her problem was.

Johnny's face grew serious and he said, "You know, I'm not a doctor,
but it looks like someone just ripped your balls off!"


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